Unrequited LoveHateThing
by xx.archimedes
Summary: Voldemort's rising in numbers and power, and Lily can't stay with her own family for the summer holidays. And it's not exactly her choice where she gets to stay. Somewhere, in her mind, equivalent to hell. Disclaimer: I own nothing. Reviews are love.
1. Chapter 1

Lily Evans was currently sitting in Professor Dumbledore's office, so pissed off she literally thought the chair under her would catch fire and self destruct.

"But, sir, Potter?! He's...he's...an idiot! And immature! And...and...EVIL!" Lily spluttered indignantly. The power above could not really hate her this much. Dumbledore gazed at her over his half moon spectacles, his blue eyes twinkling merrily. Did he find this _amusing? _She clenched her fists. He looked like fucking Santa Clause on crack.

"I'm sorry, Ms. Evans, but it is for your own safety," he replied, clasping his hands together and laying them neatly on his desk.

"My safety!" Lily fumed. "He'll molest me in my sleep!" She groaned, rubbing her temples. My God, she was going to have to stay with..with.._it. _

"Ms. Evans, I'm sure you'll have your own room. I know you're an advanced enough witch to be able to place a few good locking charms on your door."

"So you agree with me," she exclaimed. "OH MY GOD. Has he said something to you? No, he wouldn't. Did you overhear him talking to his friends? I bet they were talking about molesting me! I'M STILL A VIRGIN." Lily abruptly snapped her mouth shut and blushed furiously, her cheeks turning almost as red as her hair. But when she looked up, the spark in his twinkling blue eyes had fizzled out.

"Ms. Evans," he spoke spoftly, but with a certain power that could command thousands. "I understand that you have certain qualms with Mr. Potter, but you must put that behind you. Voldemort is rising quickly in power and numbers, and you are not safe staying with your parents. We have taken them to a safe place, including your sister," Lily snorted but Dumbledore chose to ignore this, "and you can visit them before coming back after the summer. But for the summer holidays you cannot stay with them. Do you understand?"

"But, sir, _please_. I could just go stay with them in the safe house." She opened her mouth to keep begging but the look Dumbledore gave her made her stop and nod her head in resignation. "I can take care of it, sir. Thank you."

He gave her a nod and a small smile. Lily stood from her chair, smoothing down the pleated skirt that everyone had to wear, and walked with Dumbledore to the door. "Have a good night, Ms. Evans," He said, the twinkle glittering in his eyes once again. Returning the smile, she made her way down the winding staircase and heard his voice call after. She turned around. "While you're there, do try to have some fun. Happy holidays!" He waved merrily and chuckled, turning and shutting the door behind him with a soft click. The stairs continued moving downward and she couldn't help but laugh a little at the thought of fun and Potter being in the same sentence.

By the time Lily got back to the Fat Lady, she was fuming again. Potter had probably set this up somehow; he'd bribed Remus to convince them. Everyone loved Remus! "Gillyweed," Lily gritted out between clenched teeth. The Fat Lady gave her a wary look and swung open. As soon as she stepped into the room, she noticed Black and Remus sitting by the fire concentrating fiercely on what seemed to be a chess board. She stomped over to them. "Where is he?" she hissed. Remus's head jerked up and he wordlessly pointed in the direction of the Head Boy rooms. "Hey, Evans, you'd better not permanently damage my best friend!" Black shouted after her. She ignored him.

God damnit. She hated going in this door. James just had to be an arse. "James loves Lily." The door clicked and she slammed it open, finding James laying out on his bed looking at some Quidditch magazine while lazily flicking his wand to direct clothes into a trunk. "Hey, Lils," He said slowly, not bothering to look up.

"You!" she screeched, whipping out her wand and pointing it at him. He raised his head and stared at her. "You made him do it, didn't you?! You evil, egotistical, selfish git! I don't want to stay with you! I hate you! Oh God, I cannot believe this is happening to me. Why couldn't you just leave me alone?!" She glared at him, daring him to say something. The tip of her wand started emitting green sparks.

"Lily," James said softly. "I didn't tell them to make you stay with me. I didn't make Remus convince them either."

"You're lying! Everyone knows I hate you!" She yelled, waving her wand in his face as though it meant something important.

"Aww. You don't hate me! My heart would shrivel up and die, and I could live no longer if you hated me!" He exclaimed dramatically, pressing his hand to his heart for effect. She scrutinized him with blazing emerald eyes.

"That a promise, Potter?" She growled.

"I'm hurt, my love. I truly am."

"Go jump off a cliff."

"Anything for you, Lily!"

"God, I hate you," she groaned, flopping down on the floor. "But because this isn't magically going away like I hoped it would, we're setting some ground rules."

"We are?" Potter asked, arching an eyebrow.

"It's not up for questioning, Potter," She snapped. "If you want to talk to me, you knock on my door first. There must always be at least four feet between us. You can't sit next to me during any meals, and not once, NEVER, can you ever, in any way, touch me. Yes, touching me with objects you're holding counts."

He gaped at her. "But that's not fair! What if I refuse?"

"I will never speak or look at you again."

"Fine," he groaned. "But I do not like this."

She smirked. "Good." And then she proceeded to walk out of the room, slamming the door behind her and leaving James sitting there staring after her.


	2. Chapter 2

Thank you all so much for reviewing! That means so much to me. I'm sorry that this chapter is late, but I had such a busy week. I'm only able to get this up because I'm home sick today. I think I replied to everyones review. If I didn't, I'm really sorry and i'll make sure to reply to your next one. Keep reviewing. And I'll give you...chocolate covered Sirius's. Or Remus. Actually, you can't have him. He's mine. -evil grin- **

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**Chapter Two**

Okay. So today wasn't Lily's day either. Although, the shock of yesterday had worn off a bit, despite her rabid hatred for the situation. She sighed and rubbed her eyes. No one human woke up this early. Maybe Dumbledore had forgotten to tell her something about an extremely distant relative that was actually a vampire who sucked blood and slept in a coffin during the day.

Or she was just anxious.

The common room fire glowed softly in the grate, and she stared at the flames, hypnotized by the way they danced back and forth. Pounding on the stairs pulled her abruptly from her trance. Anything that loud had to be Potter. Barking laughter soon followed, and Lily concluded that his entourage had, of course, followed him down. Lily stood and smoothed her skirt, a habit she'd had since she first started Hogwarts, and checked the silver watch on her wrist. Her eyes widened in surprise for a second; she hadn't realized how long she'd been staring at the fire.

"You're late," she snapped at Potter, tapping her foot. His eyes snapped to her own in shock. Apparently he hadn't noticed she was there. Git.

"Lily, it's only nine o'clock. The train doesn't leave until ten! We still have an hour," he said, in a way that seemed as though he was dreading her anger. She smiled on the inside.

"Well, unlike _some_ people, I don't eat like a starved animal, and I don't want to have to run to catch the train. Now that you're finally here, can we go to breakfast?"

"Aww, Lily dear. I didn't realize you were waiting for me," he gasped, faking horror at her inconvenience. "How about dinner this weekend? I won't make you wait then." He grinned, something that probably sent most girls' hearts racing. Hers, however, only clenched in disgust. Fine. He could find a carriage by his own damn self.

She turned on her heal and called back over her shoulder, "I'd rather date the Giant Squid." The last sound she heard before the portrait closed was Black snickering and Remus's kind voice saying, "I told you not to push it, Prongs."

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Alice and Molly were both sitting at their usual spot at the table, and they waved to Lily when she entered the Great Hall. Frank Longbottom sat on the other side of Alice, and he smiled shyly at her when she slid between Alice and Molly. She'd always liked Frank; his tentative affection for Alice was adorable. Molly had a faintly dazed look about her, and she seemed to be studying the Great Hall with a great deal of concentration. As Lily piled small amounts of food on her plate, she turned to her. "What's up?" She asked, scooping up some eggs. 

Molly sighed. "Just trying to remember it all," she whispered. "I probably won't ever get to see it again." Lily patted her friend sympathetically on the shoulder. Molly left Hogwarts this year, on to bigger and supposedly "better" things. Lily couldn't imagine leaving permanently yet. She had a hard enough time with the summers.

"You could always come back and be a teacher," Lily suggested. Molly scoffed.

"I won't miss it that much," She replied, snorting in amusement. Lily smiled.

"And now you'll get to be with Arthur all you want," Lily laughed, nudging her friend in the shoulder. "Who knows what he has planned." She wiggled her eyebrows for effect.

Molly giggled, pink blooming on her cheeks. "Yes, _that_ I can't wait for."

"What are you all laughing at, and how come I'm not?" Alice asked, looking suspiciously between them.

"Well, I was just telling Molly that-" raucous laughter abruptly cut her off. Of course. Couldn't Potter and Black _ever_ be silent? Or atleast somewhat quiet? She'd never understood why Remus hung out with them. He had plenty of other people that liked him. Almost as if sensing that she was thinking about him, he turned and looked at her. He shrugged and rolled his eyes in answer for his friends and gave her a small smile. She smiled back and waved. Alice poked her and Molly raised her eyebrows in curiosity.

"And what, my dear Lily, was that? Hmmm?" Molly asked, waving her hand between Lily and Remus, who was now talking animatedly with Black. "Yes, Lily, do tell. Does someone have a crush?" Alice interjected.

Lily laughed. "Stop, you guys," she whispered anxiously; Remus was only sitting three seats down from them. "We're friends. That's all."

"Really?" Alice mocked. "And do you want that to be all?"

Lily blushed. "Yes!" She hissed, and Molly and Alice both burst into laughter. Lily rolled her eyes and sighed. She really didn't like Remus that way, although she had for a while. When it had been clear that Remus just wanted to be friends, Lily dropped her feelings for him, knowing he went through enough without her pestering him. Suddenly, it dawned on Lily that there were very few people still sitting in the Great Hall and that the ones who were still there all had their trunks with them. Her watch read 9:52. She gasped and stood up. "Guys! We only have eight more minutes until the train leaves!"

Her friends looked around wildly for a moment and then stood up and ran with her to their dormitory, laughing hysterically the whole way. Lily gasped out the password when they reached the Fat Lady, and she glanced at them disapprovingly before swinging open to let them in. They rushed up to the girl's dormitory and levitated their trunks into the air, sprinting all the way back down to the carriages that took them to the train; three trunks packed to the brim flying wildly behind them.

Lily noticed with ironic frustration that the Marauders had all gotten there before them, and James smirked coyly and winked as she stepped onto the train. She had to restrain herself from punching him in the face as her friends pulled her towards a compartment.

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Click the little "Go." button down there where it says Review. Everytime you don't click it, you kill an innocent little bunny. SPARE THE BUNNY. 


	3. Chapter 3

Okay. I know this has taken forever to get up, and it's not that much, but I've been really busy with school lately. And I have mono. So I'm tired and have headaches all the time. Thank you all so much for reviewing; it means a lot. So keep doing it! For the bunnies, of course.

wink

Enjoy the chapter. I know it's short. Don't kill me. ) **

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**Chapter Three**

_Two hours later._

"No, Potter! How many times do I have to repeat myself? Are you really that thick?!" Lily seethed, throwing her hands up in exasperation. Potter really didn't know how to take a clue. How many times was he going to ask her out before he finally got it through his skull that she really really disliked him? Maybe his skull was so thick it was impenetrable.

"Just one time, Lily flower-"

"Stop _calling_ me that!"

"But you know you like it," James smirked, running a hand through his unruly black hair. Lily had just finished patrolling the length of the train, and she really didn't need James following her to her compartment. Or anywhere else. She'd rather he just fling himself off the train, actually.

"I do not like it. If I liked it, you idiot, then I wouldn't tell you to stop," she grumbled, walking faster in an effort to cut their time together short. James pouted. And sped up. God, what was his problem? Just. Go. Away. If she made herself look extremely ugly, maybe he'd go away. That was not a bad idea.

"Fine," he sulked. "I'll just go sit in a corner and slit my wrists." Lily scoffed.

"Potter, you're too fond of yourself to slit your own wrists." He looked offended. What? She was only telling the truth.

"Are you calling me vain?" He demanded, crossing his arms over his broad chest and glaring balefully at her. Lily promptly burst out laughing.

"You can't be serious!" She choked out between gasps of laughter. "You're worse than Black sometimes!"

"I am not!"

"Yeah, you are!"

"How am I vain? I've never been mean to you!"

Lily snorted. "Potter, being mean has nothing to do with vanity. Apparently you're an idiot too. Just like I've always said." She noticed his jaw working, as if he was grinding his teeth. The corner of her mouth lifted slightly in satisfaction. _Oh, have I offended poor Jamsey? _She thought wryly. Suddenly, her back was pressed against the cold wall of the train compartment. Potter's lithe body pressed flush against her, holding her captive with no means of escape. Every contour of his hard sculpted form fit against her, leaving no room to even breath. A tingle of awareness shot up her spine, and her eyes widened. He leaned in, his hot breath tickling the soft sensitive skin on her ear. Thump. Thump. Her pounding heart drowned out all sound, filling her head with a slight rushing noise.

"Not so confident now, are you?" he whispered, his voice dropping an octave, rough and husky. His lips brushed a path of fire down her neck, and her breath left her parted lips in a soft _woosh_, before he stepped back abruptly, gazing down at her with intense hazel eyes. Rational thought seemed to choose that moment to slam to the forefront of her mind. Fury seered through her body, singing in her blood and tinting her cheeks red.

"How _dare_ you?! I cannot believe Dumbledore is making me stay with you! You're completely insufferable, and I _hate_ you!" She screeched, wishing for a fleeting moment that Unforgivable curses weren't against the law. Thankfully, they'd been standing in front of her compartment for some time now, and she chose that moment to dart inside and slide the door shut as hard as she could in his face.

Alice, Molly, and Frank all stared at her with raised eyebrows, asking the same silent question that she really didn't want to answer right now. "Later," she grumbled, dropping down onto an open seat and staring moodily out the window. Merlin, she _hated_ him.

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Save the bunny. You know you want to. 


	4. Chapter 4

OKAY. SO THIS WAS NOT MY FAULT. MY COMPUTER WOULD NOT LET ME POST. I WAS VERY ANGRY.

But it's letting me post now. So, it's all good. I can promise that posts will definitely be more frequent in about five days because my school's getting out. I'm excited. You should be. AND REVIEW. CAUSE IT WAS NOT MY FAULT. I SWEAR.

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****Chapter Four**

Lily had eventually calmed down enough on the train to talk to her friends, but she hadn't told them about the Potter incident. She thought she might start emitting sparks if she said his name. Right now, she sat in the back seat of a Ministry car, pressed as close to the door as possible. James had an infuriating habit of needing to adjust the heat inside the car. Every time he did it, his hand would brush across her leg or her arm or some other part of her that she didn't want him touching.

Mr. and Mrs. Potter sat at the front of the car. They'd both acted extremely polite and kind to her; Mrs. Potter had hugged her so hard she thought her lungs might have collapsed. Maybe Potter was adopted. Except for the fact that he looked exactly like them. Mr. Potter had eyes like James's, hazel with this glint of mischief that never seemed to go away. Mrs. Potter was beautiful. She had long black hair and soft almond colored eyes. Lily had liked her right away. She figured if maybe she stuck with James's mother the stay wouldn't be so bad. Hopefully.

"So, Lily," Mr. Potter said, a light smirk tilting his lips up at the corners. "James has told us a lot about you. Talks about you all the time in fact." Lily raised her eyebrows and looked over at the boy of discussion. He, however, instead of being embarrassed, was beaming at her quite proudly. She inwardly groaned. So much for the chance to make him squirm.

"Really?" She asked. "Because he doesn't try and talk to me _at all_ at school." Mrs. Potter giggled, and looked at her husband with a fond expression. It was obvious how in love James's parents were. She wanted that someday.

"His father was the same way," She rolled her eyes. "Always trying to ask me out on dates. Kept persisting even when I told him that I'd rather eat the Giant Squid. It was right annoying." Mr. Potter pouted, a hurt expression on his face.

"I wasn't annoying," He insisted. "I was romantic, and I never gave up on our love!" Mrs. Potter snorted and whacked him gently on the arm. Lily had been so caught up in their playful bickering because it was the cutest thing _ever,_ that she hadn't noticed that James had started slowly sliding towards her. She did notice when his arm draped around her shoulders. Her eyes narrowed into dangerous slits.

"Potter!" She cried indignantly. "Get your arm off of me! You're violating my rules!"

James pouted, slowly pulling his arm away from her and looking at her like a wounded puppy. Mr. Potter looked back at them in the rear view mirror and promptly burst out laughing. Lily grinned slightly. James did look quite ridiculous. She rolled her eyes. "Potter, stop it. You look pathetic."

That only made him pout more. Git. It wasn't like she thought him pouting was _cute_ in any way.

"Potter, I suggest you stop it before I make you stop," she snapped, only to remember that his parents, who of course loved him, were sitting in front of her within clear hearing range. She stared at them with wide eyes, and realized with relief that they were still snickering. James huffed and turned away.

The car slowed to a stop, and Lily turned and almost gasped in awe before she stopped herself. Their house was _huge_. It must have been on atleast four acres. Her house sat in a yard. With a dinky fence. This one had a long circular driveway, two wraparound porches, and, from the outside, it looked to have four floors. Lily wondered how they managed to furnish the inside with that much space.

"Lily?" Potter's voice floated to her as if he was standing at the end of a long tunnel. Shaking out of her reverie, she slipped out of the car after him. "Big," she said, nodding towards the house. James snorted.

"Um, thanks?" He seemed to be laughing at her. Well, fine then. She brushed past him, purposely stepping on all of his toes as she went. He gave a startled yelp of pain.

"What'd you do that for?!" He whined from behind her. She shrugged.

"Felt like it."

Mr. and Mrs. Potter stood at the front door, waiting for the both of them to actually reach the house. She reached it before him, of course. He stood behind her and stated dramatically that her huge, _lovely_, feet had crushed all of his toes and had caused him to become crippled. Lily ignored him.

If the front of the house had been any indication for how beautiful the inside was, it had failed miserably. She took back her vow of never wanting to live in a huge house. She wanted this one. Staircases curved up to the second floor from the first, and between them one spiraling staircase climbed to all four stories. The staircases all had gleaming oak railing and marble steps. One of the walls to her left had been painted to resemble a field, done in beautiful pastel colors. The other walls were neutral colors, so as not to take away from the splendor of the first wall.

"Mr. Potter, Mrs. Potter, you're home is beautiful!" Lily exclaimed, trying to show all of her awe in that one sentence. Mrs. Potter's smile beamed.

Mr. Potter grinned and said, "Don't say that until you have to climb up to the fourth floor."

She laughed and turned to Potter. "James, could you possibly show me the rest of the house?" His face brightened considerably after she'd said it, and the pain of his 'broken' toes had apparently been forgotten.

"Of course, Lily dear," He replied, his tone deep and smooth. His arm looped through hers and pulled her away.

Mrs. Potter sighed and watched them walk away. "Do remember when were like that?" Mr. Potter huffed.

"We still are li-"

"_Potter_…Potter!…you're breaking my rules! I said atleast four feet!"

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REVIEW. ) 


	5. Chapter 5

Kay. So, I know I haven't posted in a little while. To make up for it, this one is extra long. And it has...fun...in it. Heehee. I won't be able to post until next week because I'm going on vacation, and there will be no internet service. IT SUCKS. I KNOW.

Anyways, review. And I shall love you.

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**Chapter 5**

Lily sat on the bed in her temporary room, glaring out the window and reminding herself fervently that she couldn't paint it black because it didn't belong to her. James had so kindly informed her that he could see her through it because his room was right next to hers, and his room jutted out like the one she slept in. Therefore, his window faced hers, and if she ever needed anything, to just throw a pebble! She'd mentally restrained herself from beating the living daylights out of him.

During their walk, James had, because it obviously made her feel better, tried to touch her too many times for her liking. When they'd finished on the ground floor and started climbing the stairs to the second, he tried to place his hand on her back, and she, stupidly, had allowed it, thinking it surprisingly gentlemanly. Then, of course, when they reached the top, his hand had slipped to her ass. That's when she started yelling.

He smiled charmingly and kept walking. Lily only followed because she wanted to see the rest of the house. Why had she thought Potter would be any different?

Then on the third floor, he stopped at the intricately painted tree with names on it, and explained how it showed all of his ancestors. It dated all the way back to 1200 B.C., and he'd asked her if she knew that Jesus was actually a wizard. How else would he be able to come back from the dead? When he'd pointed out his name, his arm just coincidentally brushed across her chest. She huffed and told him she didn't want to see his stupid name.

He smiled and kept walking. Lily only followed because she really wanted to see the rest of the house. Besides, it's not like Potter didn't act like that everyday.

When they finally reached the top floor, Potter had taken her hand and spun her around, pulling her in and pressing much closer than four feet. She stomped on his toes and told him that she hoped they really broke this time.

He smiled and kept walking. Lily only followed because they had gotten to the top floor, and she really wanted to see the rest.

By the time she retired to her room at night, she wondered why she had followed him at all. She could have just explored by herself at night when everyone else slept. In fact, she could do that now. It would be much nicer without Potter there, and she really wanted to look at that tree again.

Completely forgetting that Potter could see her through the window and therefore tell that she left her room, she got up and silently stole out the door. During the night, the house had turned dark and almost sinister in its vastness. But its many hallways and rooms held too many secrets, and Lily felt an overwhelming compulsion to look around. The floor remained silent under her feet; almost too silent. She padded quietly past Potter's door and to the painting of the tree.

A slight breeze wafted past her ankles as she stood in front of the tree and chills raced up her spine. Something didn't feel right. She stood still, reading the same name on the tree over and over again. The floor creaked, and her breath caught in her throat. She fingered the wand she always kept on her, especially during these times.

The house went silent again, and she breathed a sigh of relief. Maybe coming out here by herself at night hadn't been such a good idea. Then again, she was already at the tree, and she didn't have Potter breathing down her neck the whole time. She traced back from James' name. When she went back four generations, she found that James was actually distantly related to the Weasley's. Molly's family had barely two Galleons, but they were the nicest people Lily had ever known. She would miss Molly next year.

Lily concentrated on the tree again and looked back further. The floor creaked. She thought she heard footfalls behind her, and her spine went rigid. Snapping around quickly, she lifted her wand and-

"Expelliarmus!" A deadly voice hissed. Lily froze. The man in front of her wore a long black cloak with the hood pulled up and all black clothing underneath it. And, oh God, he was wearing one of those masks. It gleamed a sterile white in the darkness, and she could see dead black eyes staring wickedly back at her through the eye holes. The man gave a low laugh.

"Stupid senile Dumbledore. Thinking he could hide you from the Dark Lord at the Potter's. Their wards aren't that powerful. Not for the Dark Lord. Especially when he wants something," The man said, his voice deep and sinister. "And the Dark Lord wants you, Lily Evans, very much." He walked closer to her, his gait easy and confident.

Her throat constricted in fear. She opened her mouth to scream or say something but no sound came out. She looked around wildly, trying to find someplace to run. The man laughed again. "Oh, don't try to run. You don't even know how easy it would be for me to stop a girl like you, a disgusting _mudblood_." A spark of anger at the man's last words ignited Lily's voice.

She glared hatefully at the man. "I'm disgusting? Me? Oh yes, because you're so great, a pathetic slave to a psychotic madman. I bet your parents are so proud," Lily snapped.

The man growled. "How dare you? You little bitch!" He lifted his wand, and Lily vaguely gathered that angering the Death Eater and insulting his master probably had not been a good idea. She saw loathing flare in the man's eyes, and he threw himself at her, slamming her body against the wall. Lily bit back a cry of pain. She opened her mouth to cry out for help, but the man wrapped a strong hand around her throat. Only a small gasp slipped out of her mouth. She couldn't breath, and the Death Eater must have put a spell on her legs and arms because she couldn't move those either.

He sneered in her face and pointed his wand at her forehead. This was not the way she wanted to die. He opened his mouth and spat, "_Cruci_-!"

"Expelliarmus!" A hoarse shout came from behind the Death Eater. His wand clattered to the floor, and a look of shock splayed across his face. His grip on her neck, however, did not falter, and Lily started growing dizzy with lack of oxygen. "What the _hell_?" he hissed. Seconds later, the person shouted, "Stupefy!" and the Death Eater fell to the floor, his eyebrows scrunched together in confusion.

Lily coughed and gasped for air, dropping to her knees. Her head felt light, and she thought she might puke. A frantic shout of "Oh Merlin, Lily!" reached her ears, and she dropped to all fours. Strong arms wrapped around her waist and pulled her close to a hard, obviously male, body. She blinked in a haze and looked up into worried hazel eyes.

"Lily, are you alright? Say something," he whispered, his voice strained.

"James?" she asked hoarsely. He gave a little cry of relief and pulled her closer, burying his face in her hair.

"Oh God," he whispered fiercely. "Don't ever do that to me again. Ever. I thought for a second that y-you…you….," his voice caught roughly, and Lily thought she felt water sliding down her neck. Was James _crying_? She cupped his chin and lifted his eyes to hers. A tiny crystal tear slipped down his cheek. Her eyes met his, and she searched them in confusion. This was not like the James Potter she knew. The James Potter she knew did not cry because Lily Evans got hurt. The James Potter she knew was not her hero. And, yet, this one was.

"Were you really that worried?" Lily asked, letting her hand fall from his chin to his shoulder. She took the rather inopportune moment to notice that he had very nice shoulders. His hand closed over hers.

"Yes," he said, and Lily saw something in his eyes that shocked her. In the morning, she would tell herself that it had just been a trick of the light. Tonight, however, she saw love, and that something inside of her, what ever it was, that had stopped Lily from completely breaking down, snapped. She collapsed against James, wrapping her arms around his neck and burying her head in his chest.

"I thought I was going to die. I couldn't breathe, and he wouldn't let go. I was so scared, James. So scared," she sobbed, tears spilling from her eyes and soaking his shirt. "Shhh. It's alright. I'm here," he soothed, stroking her hair. He rocked them back and forth, whispering in her ear and calming her with soft strokes of his hand.

Eventually her tears dried and she sniffed, pulling her head away from his shirt. A big wet spot stained the front of it. She grinned weakly and looked up at him. "I got your shirt all wet."

He smiled and winked. "I shall treasure it forever," he proclaimed quietly, cupping her cheek. That sounded more like the James Potter she knew, and she gave a short laugh. His smile softened, and he continued to stare down at her, his hazel eyes warming her and making her forget the Death Eater currently knocked out cold on the floor.

Her face moved involuntarily closer to his, and her lips parted. She could feel his breath puff softly against her lips, and her eyes closed as his lips connected with hers. His lips were dry and slightly cracked, and they felt wonderful pressed against her own. The hand in her hair tightened, and he pulled her closer, pressing his mouth insistently against hers. His tongue drew along her bottom lip, and she gasped. He took the opportunity to delve inside her mouth. She shuddered and stroked his tongue with hers.

He carded his fingers through her hair as he lazily explored her mouth with his tongue. Drawing away slowly, he brushed his lips against hers and whispered, "You know, I really shouldn't be doing this." He pressed another kiss against her swollen lips. "Why?" she asked, nuzzling the side of his jaw. The hand on her cheek drew her mouth back to his, and he kissed her so deeply that she felt as though she might drown in him. He panted when he drew away this time, his broad chest heaving slightly. "It could be considered taking advantage of you," he said.

She smiled and leaned up to his ear. "I don't think it is," she whispered, nipping his ear before drawing back to face him. His hazel eyes turned dark and sparked with intensity, and it made something inside her coil in desire. "Well, in that case," he replied, his voice low and husky. He gripped her auburn tendrils, crushing her lush mouth to his. Suddenly, Lily found herself lifted from the floor and wrapped around a strong, tall, body of muscle and limbs. She squeaked and he swallowed the sound, walking forward and carrying her full weight at the same time.

James Potter was a lot stronger than he looked, Lily concluded absently, crushing herself to him for dear life. Apparently this was a bad idea because James faltered in his stride and groaned. He drew away from her slightly. "You can't do that and expect me to walk," he panted. Lily giggled. "Sorry."

He grinned and kept walking. He didn't move to kiss her again, and it gave Lily the time to realize just how tired she really felt. A yawn escaped her, and she laid her head on James' shoulder. One of his arms left her waist and she grumbled before realizing that he had opened the door. A few steps later he set her down on the soft bed, and she breathed a sigh of relief. Her eyes began to droop. "You're going to stay, right?" Lily mumbled.

"Of course. I'm not going anywhere," he said, grabbing a chair and settling down beside her. Lily smiled and closed her eyes.

And she felt safe.

* * *

Review. Cause I said so.


	6. Chapter 6

I know I've taken forever to post this chapter. I'm not happy with it. I have a writer's block. A BIG ONE. IT'S MAKING ME ANGST. BADLY. But I hope you guys like this chapter.

AND EVERYONE WHO REVIEWED IS SO AWESOME.

I love you.

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**Chapter 6**

Lily groaned softly and opened her eyes. Sunlight burst into her skull, and she decided it would be a much better idea to just keep them closed. Merlin, what the hell had she been thinking last night? She had kissed James Potter. With _tongue_. At that moment, she thought a knife looked rather desirable.

Oh God. He'd left the Death Eater there. And now they were all going to die. Why did she even trust James Potter? Had her brain made a miraculous discovery that it could move and run away? She flung back the covers and raced toward the door. The room spun for a sickening moment; maybe she shouldn't have gotten out of bed so fast. A chair in front of the door blocked her slightly wobbling rampage, and she glanced down to find a snoring Potter slouched in it.

The room went a shade of red for a moment.

"Potter!" she yelled, reaching down and shaking him awake. He jumped and blinked up at her. "Wha'?" he asked intelligently, rubbing his eyes and straightening his glasses.

"You. Left. The. Death. Eater!" Lily hissed, gesticulating at the door. He rolled his eyes. "Stop freaking out, Lils. After you fell asleep, I went and got my dad. He took him into the Ministry," he replied smoothly. Her mouth opened and closed soundlessly.

"What?"

He frowned. "I am capable of thought," he groused. She grinned. "Of course you are, Jamsie." She moved around him and his chair, opening the door. "I'm hungry. See you in the kitchen," Lily quipped. He grabbed her wrist.

"Lily, wait," He swallowed nervously, and Lily's hands grew damp with cold sweat. "Um,…I…well, about last night…"

"Forget it!" she said, a large probably extremely fake looking smile splitting across her face. He opened his mouth to say something(or catch flies. She wasn't sure.), but she pulled her hand away and closed the door. It clicked shut with a note of finality. Lily leaned back against it, taking in deep shaking breaths. What was wrong with her?

She should not be shaking. She should not be feeling her stomach churn in regret. She should not be feeling anything but relief at finally getting away from Potter. Sighing heavily, Lily pushed herself away from the door and headed towards the staircase. Bloody Potter. He was a stupid, big headed, egotistical, git. She really did not like him.

At. All.

Huffing at her own foolishness, _Pfft. Potter, really. She was just scared last night. That's all, _she started down the stairs. Potter's mother was standing in front of the kitchen counter and pointing her wand at what looked like pancake batter floating in the air. Mr. Potter sat at the kitchen table, the Daily Prophet opened in front of him. The headline screamed in bold letters, **You-Know-Who's Army Grows. **A picture of the Minister of Magic moved below it.

Lily stared at the headline sadly, wondering how many were going to die or get hurt in this war. Suddenly something brushed past her, and she jumped. Potter sat down at the table by his father, grabbing toast and the finished pancakes, resolutely not looking in Lily's direction. Merlin, Potter acted like such a baby.

"Good morning, Mr. and Mrs. Potter," Lily said, sitting down in a chair opposite of Potter's father. Mrs. Potter dropped her wand and rushed over to her. "Oh, Lily! Are you alright? How are you feeling? I couldn't believe it. A Death Eater in our own house. You look a tinge pale, honey. Sit down and eat something." The motherly woman pushed Lily forcefully into a chair and started piling her plate with pancakes, toast, and black pudding.

Lily fought the insistent urge to snigger, and opted instead for a kind smile. "I'm fine, Mrs. Potter. Your son," Lily inclined her head towards James, "managed to save me." James looked up at her in surprise, probably at the fact that she had just complimented him in front of his family. Mrs. Potter glowed with pride.

She began to eat her pancakes, and when she looked up to grab some jam for her toast, James hazel eyes were still trained on her. His eyes darkened in some emotion as he scrutinized her face. For some reason, a flush spread across her cheeks and she looked back at her plate. This really needed to stop. Her mind had started wondering to bad, bad places. Places that contained evil, black-haired, gits.

She sighed and stabbed her fork into the black pudding. Sniggering sounded from her left. Lily set down her fork and glared over at Potter. He was watching her, his mouth curled up in a smirk. Her eyes narrowed further. An itching desire to just get away from the git consumed her. "I'm sorry, Mrs. Potter. I'm not very hungry. May I be excused?"

* * *

Mrs. Potter paused in her eating and nodded. "Of course, Lily." She watched the young redhead get up and walk briskly out the kitchen door with concerned eyes. As soon as the door shut, Mrs. Potter's eyes snapped to her son. 

"James Potter, what did you do?!"

James gave a startled yelp and dropped his fork. "Nothing!" he said, his eyes wide. Mrs. Potter snorted, and ignored her husband's rather poor attempt at listening to them discreetly. Her eyes narrowed dangerously.

"That nothing sounded suspiciously like something," she said slowly, her voice lowered. "You want to explain?" James figured that he really didn't have any choice; the sound of her voice had made sure that the question was more of a, _'Tell me what you did or I'm taking away your broom.'_

He sighed and put his face in his hands. "I srt'f keesd hr lst nut tr dthter tackd hr."

"You kicked her with a dirty tack? What?" She sounded distinctly confused. He let out a bitter snort. Mr. Potter had dropped his newspaper and was watching his wife and son with interest. He dropped his hands but remained looking at the table.

"The night that the Death Eater attacked, I kissed her afterwards. She was scared, and now she won't talk to me. I'm so stupid," he groaned, dropping his head down on the table next to his hands. Mrs. Potter gave her son a pitying look and walked over to kneel next him. She laid a hand on his shoulder. "It'll all work out soon enough. You'll see. Just give her some time and don't do anything rash."

James mumbled something unintelligible. Mr. Potter snorted. His son looked up and glared at him.

"Oh, stop wallowing so much, son. Your mother was the same way as Lily. And she came around," Mr. Potter said, grinning foolishly. James's eyes narrowed further.

"Hey, dad?"

He raised an eyebrow.

"Shut up."

* * *


	7. Note

I know that once everyone opens this chapter they're going to want to shoot me. Because it actually isn't a chapter. Frankly, I really wouldn't mind all that much right now. I'm angsting. Actually, I think I may be beyond angsting. My heart has been torn out by the ruthless world of technology and its many faults.

So, my laptop hard drive is dead. It burned to death. Along with EVERY SINGLE THING IT HELD. LIKE, FOR INSTANCE, THIS FIC. AND EVERY OTHER THING I'VE EVER WRITTEN.

I'm pretty much dead right now. I have to go through a recovery period, and then maybe I can look at my laptop when it comes back. I'm too angry to want to look at it right now. It's at the computer shop anyways.

I daydreamed that it ran across one of those field with the long grass towards me with all of it's lovely programs and files. That is how truly pathetically attached I am to my laptop and it's files.

But, just to let you guys know, a chapter might be a little while. My hard drive also contained my summer assignments. I have to do a whole book report and newspaper article again. And my school starts in, like, five days.

Kill me. Go ahead. You can find me in angst land.


	8. Chapter 8

It will not ever take me this long to have a chapter up again. I promise. Please review. I may, in fact, because I've been so horrible, post another chapter by next weekend. I love reveiws! 

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**Chapter 7**

Lily sprinted up the staircase. She reached the third floor and ran to her bedroom door, opening it and falling against it after it closed. _Oh God, _she thought. _This cannot be happening to me. It's too fast. I'll just...have to tell Dumbledore I can't stay here. Not ever. _She sighed heavily and scrunched her eyes close, as if that would block out all the thoughts swirling in her head.

She would just have to forget about these _feelings_, or whatever they were, because she couldn't deal with them. Not now. And especially not for James Potter. In fact, this whole problem was probably only occurring from one night. It's not like he had any other redeemable moments. She shook herself and moved away from the door. Lily sat down at the chair in front of the small desk in her room and pulled out some ink, a quill, and parchment. She felt a sudden overwhelming wave of homesickness.

She missed her parents, her own room, even bickering with Petunia. At her own house, this stupid thing with Potter wouldn't have happened. She dipped her quill in the ink and began to write.

_Mom and Dad, _

_How are you? Is everything going okay? My Headmaster told me that you guys were staying in a safe house. I miss you. I'm staying with James Potter, which I'm sure Headmaster Dumbledore already cleared with you. His parents are really nice, and Mr. Potter works at the Ministry of Magic. _

_My school year was great. I did well in all of my subjects; I'm still top in my class. Although, Severus, the boy I've told you about, is almost tied with me. He's very smart. I almost wish I could have stayed with him instead, but Dumbledore seemed strangely objective to the idea. _

_I'll try and contact Dumbledore to see if I can visit you or see you somehow. I hope everything is going well so far, and give Petunia the other piece of parchment enclosed, please. Write back as soon as possible, and send it with Athena. _

_Love, _

_Lily_

Lily felt slightly better after writing her parents, and couldn't help pulling out another sheet of paper and writing:

_Petunia:_

_I'm staying with one of the hottest and most popular boys in school. So much for me being a freak. I hope you enjoy your summer in isolation!_

_Love,_

_Your Sister_

She snickered and folded the small note up with her parent's letter. Lily stood and walked over to Athena's cage. Athena leveled her with a cold glare and turned around on her perch.

"I suppose I deserved that," Lily muttered. "Come on, girl. I've been really busy. I'm sorry I haven't been paying as much attention to you. I need you to deliver this letter to my parents."

Athena remained stonily facing the wall. Lily sighed.

"Please! I'll give you free reign to peck Petunia."

The black eagle owl turned slowly around on her perch. Lily laughed and opened the latch. Athena hoped out onto Lily's arm, regarding her with intelligent gold eyes, almost as if she knew what Lily had been thinking about before.

"Don't look at me that way," Lily huffed. "I'm fine." Athena ruffled her feathers and stuck out her leg. She tied the letter to owl's leg and opened the window, stroking her feathers and then watching as she flew off. She reached up to close the window, and a ball of white feathers streaked into the window, zooming over her head and twittering madly. Lily shrieked, jumping and tripping over her own feet. She landed on a pillow that had fallen off the bed and slid off, laying on the floor and staring up at the ceiling. Sheela, Molly's owl, continued to fly madly around the room. Today was not going well.

So, of course, just to push it, Potter decided to choose that moment to walk into her bedroom. Lily groaned. Potter stopped and stared at her like she was an odd colored worm.

"Um, Lily," Potter said slowly. "Are you feeling alright? Why are you laying on the floor? I can assure you that the bed is perfectly comfortable."

Lily lifted her head up to glare at him. "Just shut up, Potter. What are you even doing here? I don't like you. You annoy me." Lily dropped her head back onto the floor. Sheela flew across the ceiling again. "Sheela doesn't like you either. She's quite deadly. You should be afraid. I suggest running. Far, far away."

He continued to stare. Was she not getting her point across?

"Did you hit your head on something?" Potter asked. "Plus, Molly's owl loves me."

Lily rolled her eyes. "Of course she does. Everyone loves you," She mimicked.

He stared. What was wrong with him? She sighed and clambered up to her feet; Potter looked distinctly pacified now that she was vertical again.

"Except for me. Now go," Lily commanded, gesticulating toward the door. For some reason, he still didn't move. "God, do you ever listen to anything I say?"

All of the creases disappeared from his smooth face and his dark brown eyes hardened with intensity. "That's, um, actually what I came up here for."

Her eyebrows rose. "What? To listen to what I say? Oh, then leave. Because that's what I say."

"No!" He said, throwing his hands up in exasperation. Lily took a small moment to reflect that it was almost as if the roles were switched. It was kind of nice. "I just. Look, I'm sorry, ok? I didn't mean to take advantage of you or anything last night." He cleared his throat and looked slightly to Lily's left. Actually, it wasn't nice. At all. She didn't want to think about this. She couldn't think about this.

"Potter, just forget about it. It doesn't matter," she said, watching Sheila twitter madly at something invisible on the wall.

James rubbed a hand over his face. "You have to stay here the whole summer, Lily. And it's not going to be any easier if it's awkward the whole time. How about," he coughed lightly and she peeled her eyes away from the riveting sight of Sheila trying to peck nothing to death. "How about we try being friends?"

Lily blinked and wondered if she had hit her head on something when she tripped earlier. All of the ways that this could possibly not go the way she wanted to ran through her head. "Alright then. But I still demand that you follow my rules."

A grin lit up Potter's face. "Fine. I'll try to keep my wayward mind under control." Lily rolled her eyes and laughed despite herself. "Plus," he added. "I knew you couldn't stay away from me for long." Then proceeded to walk out the room.

She should have been expecting that. She really, really should have.

"You _ass_!"


End file.
